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Archive for January, 2008
General

Man, That’s A Lot Of Milk

January 31st, 2008

Another day, another men’s magazine prints a list of the 99 most desirable women. And, as with last year’s Maxim list, I find myself going “huh.” (Angelina Jolie is only #35? Lindsey Lohan is still considered desirable by anyone?) I’ll grant you that there’s ample cleavage on display, but I guess I’m looking for a little more in my fantasy women, like a discernible personality or even knowing who in the hell they are. I can identify only a little more than half the names on the list, which suggests that I would utterly fail a trivia quiz about underwear models.

Besides, I can’t take seriously a list of the 99 most desirable women that leaves out Tina Fey. I mean, really. Is Alessandra Ambrosio the least bit funny?

General ,

Weird

I Won’t Tell You How Many I Find Applicable

January 30th, 2008

Vic sent me this link to a site that sells “demotivational posters”. Among my favorites: “Destiny – You were meant for me. Perhaps as a punishment.”

Weird

Games

My Love Of Little Men

January 27th, 2008

And one more archival clip: a news story from WSIL-TV in Carbondale, Illinois regarding the Egyptian Campaign gaming convention back in April, 2007. I was playing in a session of Lego Pirate Wars, and as the colorful sea vessels were much more photogenic than graph paper dungeons or rolling dice, our game was prominently featured. There are a couple of nice closeups of my personal flagship, the Bloody Monkey.

Admittedly, I do think that my quote could easily be misconstrued if taken out of context…

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Doctor Who

Guess Who’s Back?

January 27th, 2008

Here’s another old video clip I found while dubbing my old VHS to DVD: a Doctor Who promo I produced for WILL-TV back in the ’90s. I had cherry-picked a “Best of Doctor Who” package featuring classic stories with all seven then-current Doctors. The big question-mark graphic is cheesy, but I think that the combination of clips and narration is fun.

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TV

I Like Lycra

January 23rd, 2008

Another Hulu excerpt, this time from the ultimate ’80s cheese whiz, Buck Rogers. It’s the infamous “Space Vampire” episode in which Buck and Wilma encounter a vampire…in space! He’s actually a alien called the Vorvon and he kinda looks like Nosferatu with severe cranial inflammation, but he’s not what makes this episode memorable.

No, that would be this scene, in which Erin Gray (who absolutely rocked a spandex spacesuit) chewed the scenery like few ever have when portraying a Vorvon-possessed Wilma.

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TV

MeTube

January 23rd, 2008

One side benefit of Vicky’s current obsession with the Australian Open tournament is that we needed to buy a DVD recorder to dub off some of the non-tennis stuff taking up valuable space on our TiVo-Like Device. While it’s certainly useful in that regard, the bonus for me is that I can finally tackle the problem of my deteriorating VHS tapes. While I’ve substituted many of my old off-air recordings with shiny, store-bought DVDs, there’s still a lot of stuff that would be otherwise impossible to replace.

So, while the tennis balls ping back and forth in the living room, I’ve set up a DVD duplication facility in the basement, attempting to digitally preserve this old video before the tapes (some more than twenty years older) become unplayable.

Another benefit is that I get to share the “wealth.” Here then are a couple of clips that I dubbed to DVD, ripped to AVI and uploaded to YouTube PDQ. Both are from a mid-’80s TV show called Stingray, starring Nick Mancuso as a mysterious hero who helps the helpless in exchange for favors, which he then uses to help other helpless people. It was kinda clever, in that a guest star victim could reappear in a future episode as a favor-provider.

However, it also bore the sign of its times: an unbearably cheesy Miami Vice vibe. Here’s the opening sequence.

The reason I bring it up is that during the year I spent in Los Angeles fresh out of college, I was an intern at Stephen J. Cannell Productions at the time they were simultaneously producing The A-Team, Riptide, Hunter, Hardcastle & McCormick and, yes, Stingray. And while my duties as intern consisted almost entirely of standing around the set attempting to bond with the crew, I got to be an extra in a couple of shows.

That’s quite a long introduction to this brief clip, in which I can be seen in quite possibly the last place on Earth you’d likely find me: a revivalist tent meeting. The video’s a bit dark, but that’s me in the front row, pimped out in a ten-dollar thrift store suit and passing the collection plate with elan.

It wasn’t my last appearance on national TV, but it was the only one involving a 12-foot, illuminated cross.

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Tina Fey

The Colonel Returns

January 22nd, 2008

Here’s one of the Hulu clips I previously posted: a Saturday Night Live sketch written by the inestimable Tina Fey regarding a Southern colonel who’s very popular with the ladies…

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TV

Alright, Let’s Try This Again

January 22nd, 2008

A couple of weeks back, I told you about the video file sharing service Hulu (or, more properly, hulu), a commercial site which streams full-length episodes of more than a hundred different TV series, current and classic. I had embedded a couple of videos here, but they inexplicably went belly up after a few days. After I got nowhere with Hulu’s tech support, I wound up removing the posts.

That said, I just gave it another go and for now the clips seem to be playing on this site again. I’m gonna try a test and see how it goes.

Here’s a (really, the) classic bit from WKRP in Cincinnati, involving the radio station’s secret Thanksgiving promotion…

TV ,

Movies

Geek Connection

January 22nd, 2008

Here’s a favorite moment from Cloverfield, in which Hud (the geek holding the video camera) attempts to find common ground with Marlena, the object of his infatuation.

 

I have been that guy. I am still that guy.

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Movies

Take That, Dean Devlin

January 19th, 2008

As you might expect, I didn’t waste much time before going to see Cloverfield. A major American studio releases a giant monster movie? Damn skippy I’m there.

In brief, I enjoyed it a lot. It offered no more than the contents listed on the label, but it accomplished what it set out to do. It took the traditional monster rampage down to street level and made it an intense viewing experience.

While it’s accurate to describe Cloverfield in terms of the original Godzilla and The Blair Witch Project, I think that you can throw a few more influences into the mix. As in Spielberg’s War of the Worlds remake, it never strayed from the protagonists’ view of events; we knew only what they learned from direct observation and second-hand chatter. It also reminded me of the cult classic Miracle Mile, which took place over a single night as the main character delayed his escape to safety (in that case, from a purported nuclear holocaust) to go back for his girlfriend.

Most obviously, it was reminiscent of the American Godzilla remake, hence the title of this post. In addition to the New York setting, here too was a giant monster which spawned a horde of ground-level critters to offer a more direct threat to the humans. I don’t know that anyone set out to throw it in the face of Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich and show them how to make an effective monster movie, but there it was.

Japanese monster flicks rarely concern themselves with the humans inevitably seen fleeing underfoot. They tend to be about the spectacle of mass destruction and the response of scientists and armies. Giant Japanese monsters (colloquially known as “kaiju”) almost never target their rage on individual people. It’s that aspect of Cloverfield, rather than the “Blair Witch”-cam, that made it unique.

Another welcome aspect of Cloverfield was that it got back to the old idea of the kaiju as metaphor. The first Godzilla was, of course, directly inspired not just by the destruction of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, but also by American testing of atomic weapons in the Pacific. The American Godzilla, however, had none of that, and in fact went as far as to blame the big lizard on the French. With Cloverfield, the monster was very much a stand-in for the terror of 9/11, something a great deal closer to our anxieties than French nukes. It ain’t subtle, but neither was Godzilla.

While both films pretended to be “found footage” from a discarded camcorder, one advantage that Cloverfield had over The Blair Witch Project was that there’s deliberate planning behind-the-scenes. The camera might’ve been whipping around, but it wasn’t just capturing random, improvised footage. You saw what you needed to follow the plot.

Granted, it wasn’t all that challenging a story. There’s just enough of a boy-longs-for-girl thing to provide a reason to care about the characters. Still, I liked the way in which the romantic angle was worked into the film, with the narrative abruptly cutting away to brief flashes of the couple in happier times. (The in-movie reason for this was that the camcorder was taping over footage of a previous date to Coney Island, and bits of the old video can be seen when the camera was stopped and restarted.)

The monsters were effective, and for the most part the filmmakers wisely adopted a less-is-more take: there were only a handful of shots in which we got a good look at them. The main creature was some sort of anorexic, bipedal lizard (hmmm, like the American Godzilla?), and its parasites were nasty, screechy bugs.

Assuming that Cloverfield does as well as its opening night box office take suggests, I think it would be fun to see a “sequel” in which we get a more traditional take on the same events. While that might sound like just another kaiju flick, I think it would have the advantage that we, the audience, would know that even while we’re watching the destruction on the macro level, down on the micro level there are individual people we’ve already met fighting to survive.

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