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Home > Games > 31 Monstrous Failures #16: Black Pudding

31 Monstrous Failures #16: Black Pudding

October 16th, 2011

Once again, I’m fudging the premise of this year’s Halloween countdown. The monster known as the Black Pudding isn’t itself a failure. In its day (the mid ’70s), it was a formidable addition to Dungeons & Dragons‘ roster of roving oozes. It was immune to cold-based attacks, and lightning bolts split it into two or more independent creatures. The Black Pudding quickly dissolved adventurers’ hard-won loot and generally made for a bad day in the labyrinth.

Not being familiar with British foodstuffs, I was puzzled by the Black Pudding’s odd name. And it wasn’t until this month–during my just-concluded trip to the U.K.–that I was at last confronted by the reality of the…

Black Pudding!

Two of the three hotels at which I stayed included black pudding in their breakfast buffets. A combination of curiosity and a desire to sample the local cuisine led me to sample the hockey puck-shaped item. To be honest, it didn’t taste like much of anything. It was just a hard, in-no-way-pudding-like object that was inexplicably deemed edible.

It wasn’t until a few days later at a butcher’s stand that I thought to inquire about the composition of the black pudding. Turns out that it’s really a quasi-sausage primarily made of congealed pig’s blood. I don’t know if this was one of those”we use every part of the buffalo” notions, or if someone was sitting around one day thinking “what am I going to do with all of this pig’s blood?,” but that anyone ever believed that this was a thing that people should eat boggles me. And that they would still do so in the 21st Century? Really, blood pucks for breakfast are best left behind with leeching and the other shitty ideas of our stupid, stupid ancestors.

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